Seven thousand and 00/100
No concept of how to spend big money, that's what I'm noticing. $7000 is a lot of money.
The last 7 days has been like watching a movie trailer go by. I seem to be able to step back and observe my thoughts and feelings about money without judging them. That's been nice. I've noticed that I don't generally think to share it very much. I told Poopsie about throwing a big chunk of the money towards a trip out west but upon further discussion I realized it hadn't even occurred to me to pay for both of our trips.
It's as if I've been suriving on necessity for such a long time that sharing doesn't even occur to me. For instance, when I go grocery shopping I get exactly what I need, no more, no less. The other day I came home and my roomate had a can of black beans out on the counter that I had bought. She was going to use them in a recipe. I bought those b/c they were on sale and I use them in a recipe. I don't plan on making the recipe anytime soon and there's plenty of time for them to be replaced...however the point is I bought one can and one can only and they're sacred.
$$ right now is the same way. I budget things right down to the picky little cent and it's a big deal when I don't get that $1 back at breakfast when I put in a $10 to cover my $7 breakfast + tip. I definitely feel some judgment towards this...hard up, pathetic, irresponsible.
Okay, okay, $7000.
I'd like to play around with being a philanthropist of sorts. The word sure is fun to say. I'd like to set a large lump of money aside, maybe for scholarships, in an account that will continue to mature and grow and therefore continue to feed itself and others. Let's do half, so $3500. I'll put it into an account that will grow and collect interest and it will go towards kids. In fact, I'll get real specific and put it towards high school girls in the town I grew up in...it will help fund new uniforms for girls' sports. No budget existed for that when I was in high school and we wore some pretty pathetic uniforms.
I'm looking up above and thinking to myself that I really don't know much about budgeting, if $3500 is a realistic and helpful amount, etc. I'm trying not to feel shame over my absolute lack of knowledge of money, how to budget it, what things really cost, the thought that goes into budgeting, etc. I'm clueless. I'm also aware that my words carry energy and I want to remember to say that yes, right now at 3:22 a.m. on Tuesday, September 19th I don't know all I want to know about money AND that's okay. because I'm good enough and smart enough and gosh darn it people like me...hehehe a little tribute to SNL.
$3500.
My familial background is German Amish. My dad's great great grandfather dropped out of the Amish religion. I am telling you this b/c I'm sitting here noticing that I don't have a whole lot of interest in buying things. Things don't necessarily interest me. If you look at my living space, it's pretty minimal regardless of what kind of income I'm bringing in. Music is probably my one big splurge. Lots-o-CDs. This last $3500 could go towards a car...I think I may have already spent $$ on a car in a recent $$ blog. Savings, donation, pay off bills. Hmmmmm. I seem to be thinking that it needs to be spent, that I need to spend it, I need to buy something ~ ANYTHING, it's burning a hole in my pocket, get it out, quick!!!!
I'm going to stick it in my pocket and go for a walk. I think I'll walk up to the first person I see on the street and hand them the money just to see the look on their face.
Whew! Thank God it's gone!
The last 7 days has been like watching a movie trailer go by. I seem to be able to step back and observe my thoughts and feelings about money without judging them. That's been nice. I've noticed that I don't generally think to share it very much. I told Poopsie about throwing a big chunk of the money towards a trip out west but upon further discussion I realized it hadn't even occurred to me to pay for both of our trips.
It's as if I've been suriving on necessity for such a long time that sharing doesn't even occur to me. For instance, when I go grocery shopping I get exactly what I need, no more, no less. The other day I came home and my roomate had a can of black beans out on the counter that I had bought. She was going to use them in a recipe. I bought those b/c they were on sale and I use them in a recipe. I don't plan on making the recipe anytime soon and there's plenty of time for them to be replaced...however the point is I bought one can and one can only and they're sacred.
$$ right now is the same way. I budget things right down to the picky little cent and it's a big deal when I don't get that $1 back at breakfast when I put in a $10 to cover my $7 breakfast + tip. I definitely feel some judgment towards this...hard up, pathetic, irresponsible.
Okay, okay, $7000.
I'd like to play around with being a philanthropist of sorts. The word sure is fun to say. I'd like to set a large lump of money aside, maybe for scholarships, in an account that will continue to mature and grow and therefore continue to feed itself and others. Let's do half, so $3500. I'll put it into an account that will grow and collect interest and it will go towards kids. In fact, I'll get real specific and put it towards high school girls in the town I grew up in...it will help fund new uniforms for girls' sports. No budget existed for that when I was in high school and we wore some pretty pathetic uniforms.
I'm looking up above and thinking to myself that I really don't know much about budgeting, if $3500 is a realistic and helpful amount, etc. I'm trying not to feel shame over my absolute lack of knowledge of money, how to budget it, what things really cost, the thought that goes into budgeting, etc. I'm clueless. I'm also aware that my words carry energy and I want to remember to say that yes, right now at 3:22 a.m. on Tuesday, September 19th I don't know all I want to know about money AND that's okay. because I'm good enough and smart enough and gosh darn it people like me...hehehe a little tribute to SNL.
$3500.
My familial background is German Amish. My dad's great great grandfather dropped out of the Amish religion. I am telling you this b/c I'm sitting here noticing that I don't have a whole lot of interest in buying things. Things don't necessarily interest me. If you look at my living space, it's pretty minimal regardless of what kind of income I'm bringing in. Music is probably my one big splurge. Lots-o-CDs. This last $3500 could go towards a car...I think I may have already spent $$ on a car in a recent $$ blog. Savings, donation, pay off bills. Hmmmmm. I seem to be thinking that it needs to be spent, that I need to spend it, I need to buy something ~ ANYTHING, it's burning a hole in my pocket, get it out, quick!!!!
I'm going to stick it in my pocket and go for a walk. I think I'll walk up to the first person I see on the street and hand them the money just to see the look on their face.
Whew! Thank God it's gone!
posted by Kepola at
12:08 AM
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